Deep in Thoughts

hubby's gonna start school in 2 wks time. its gonna be a different lifestyle and prolly this phase will determined if our r/s can be sustained.

maybe de best word to describe how i feel is, insecurity.

A worthwhile conversation over lunch..

A: quite sad that im leaving this place so soon... suddenly so many memories in my mind.

B: its for de better rite? not everyone has this opportunity :) i dun even hav this chance..

A: im in a dilemma, cos i aint sure if i can cope with de new envt.. it will be very different..

B: its a matter of time gal..

A: jus now i felt kinda down, emailed my bf about my worries... he said sth which made me feel reali loved n im so happy cos i can feel that he is the one.. i nvr believe in true love.. but now, maybe not..

B: hehe wad did he say???

A: he told me tat even if i were to break de bond and become jobless, he will still be there for me. He wans us to go thru every phase of life tgt.. to go thru thick n thin tgt.. as husband n wife..

B: (after hearing and seeing the smile on her face, i feel really happy. This is one of de best smile i hav seen on her face.. and i feel she has found the Mr Right Guy too)

She ("A") was de first person i spoke to on my 1st day at work.

She was de first person who wish me "happy birthday" on my 22nd birthday.

She has always been my lunch partner.

90% of the time, we order de same food.

Our standard order is always "1 kopi 1 teh tarik".

She always lend a listening ear to my problems, be it work or r/s.

We always email each other to complain, to gossip etc.

We go to de ladies tgt.

We wait for each other to go home tgt be it how late it is (altho we take different trains!).

She is someone i never regretted knowing.. :):)

Will i find my Mr Right Guy too?

New addition to my house

Food i have to avoid:
-chocolate
-coffee
-tea

Dun get it wrong... i'm not on a diet... =p

How sad, coffee and tea are my favourite! I usually have a cup of tea in de morn, and a cup of kopi in de noon... now i cant have both :(

In short, doctor says i have to consume more veg.. and increase my water intake.. *ahhh*

Seriously... im gonna miss all the mocha/latte/teh ping etc..

Pls dun tempt me ok!! =p

Surgery is not required at de moment, but if i dun control my food..... :(

My colleagues been scaring me... tat i have not been concentrating at work :(

well, i had a bad day at work today in fact. now tat im home.. im trying to take work issues with a pinch of salt. sigh.. its a consolation tat tmr its finally Friday! and im seeing my precious (?) =)

at least hubby had a pretty nice day :) he met an online fren for his car lights, and seems like de guy is sincerely nice, with no ulterior motive :) *thumbs up*

some pics from de last 2 wkends.. June is seriously a birthday month! lol~

slacking at TCC..


Ms Greedy & Mr Strong.. hehe..


Peg's 21st @ Chevrons:


And recently.. my house had a new addition.. ..



yup, mum bought this! Maybe she dun wan me to go outside for spa n spend $$? hehehe...


will try it out soon! hehehe... ;)

Blog revamped!

hubby might be blogging soon! so i changed de blog a little.. *grin* --> anticipating your entry!

Jo commented tat my recent entries are all so depressing.. hmm. life's full of ups and downs yah? have been feelin down recently.. but okok i promise.. to brighten our blog with cheerful entries in future! :)

as i browse thru the 2006 entries.. all i can conclude is, time really flies! its been a year since hubby commissioned! and i re-read the letter (click here) hubby wrote during his pre-commissioned (stress) period.. how i miss those love letters! --> hint?

=p

Fragile life

its been a tough week.. and the upcoming week will also be a difficult one.

a week of uncertainties & decision-making..

i came across tis blog fr my fren.. & many thoughts came to my mind. de fragile aspect of life.. is scary.

with lotsa stuff weighing on my mind.. im thankful for him, trying to be always there for me.. i really appreciate de effort. i hope i aint a burden to u.. im trying to get back de smile on me again! =p

will blog again.. wen im in a better state of health. *cross finger* meanwhile, will look fwd to de upcoming numerous birthday celebrations :)

The feeling of depression

sometimes, we arent jus tt lucky in life.. be it frens/ school/ work/ love/ family...

emotionally, i feel v depressed these days. and more paranoid i guess (?)

i dunno wads exactly on my mind.. cos there's too much things running thru me.. i dunno how to handle. and i dunno who to turn to.

At one moment, i feel like a failure.

everyday i wake up telling myself to be happy, that it is a brand new day of smiles and not tears.. but it nvr worked. it nvr did.

within 1/2hr, there wld be tears in my eyes, be it on de bus/ train.. and at work. de ladies is de best place to calm myself down.. but soon later, my eyes will be welled wif tears (again).

i try to be strong. i try to put on a smile. but deep down.. thats not how i feel.

today, as i approach the mrt track, my mind had a sudden urge to jus walk down into de track..

i think, i feel lost. aimless. and hopeless.

i dunno wad im expecting for, or hoping for.. cos de more i expect, de greater de disappointment..

tonite, i hope i dun cry myself to sleep (again).. .. its painful, in my heart.

EMO

Recently, been thinking a lot.. bout de future.. sometimes maybe i tink too much, which becomes unhealthy.

But everythg that is happening ard me, has made me increase doubts on lotsa things. I hear bout so many "unfaithful" incidents, tat im so afraid i'll experience de same thg one day.

One fren has been wif bf for 5 yrs.. its long enuf for a r/s to be stable (i feel?). Only to noe tt.. during tis 5 yrs, bf had slept wif 2 other gals..

Another gal fren, unintentionally found her bf 2-timing on her..

what am i suppose to advice dem? i am unsure wad to say myself.. it jus daunt on me tt if ever such situation were to happen to me.. wad will i do??

feeling exceptionally emotional these days.. *DIT*

April updates

sheesh.. many overdue posts, hehe =p

5Apr
Since the next day was Good Friday, we headed out for dinner @ some thai restaurant @ Centrepoint, then chilled @ Acid Bar. depsite the crowded-ness, we had fun bitching ard! :)





6Apr
Hubby wen for his sao mu in the morn, den drop by my place after tt :) we were supposed to have dinner & mahjong @ his grandma's plc, so while hubby was slping... i decided to make some brownie, hehe :) slept v late tt nite after mahjong =p

the whole month of April, hubby & i have been relying on public transport, hehe. so the lazy us din do much shopping.. more of lazing ard =p

20Apr
we were both on leave. supposedly meeting hubby @ Eunos on thurs for dinner @ my plc. unexpectedly, we bumped into each other in de train cabin! lol~ i got onto de same cabin as him @ Tanjong Pagar! heh.

so Friday.. we slacked at home den headed to Harbourfront -- for our cruise! :)

dun the boarding pass look different? hee.






having our dinner:




on our way to the casino:






woke up to catch de sunrise =p


















on our way back:


27Apr
A night spent at.. MOS! The pictures speaks all :)







havoc!


Headed to hubby's plc thereafter.. got up the nex morning, to collect the long awaited car! hehe =p hubby's parents saw de car few days earlier, and constantly told us "the car is gorgeous!". it made hubby & i all the more excited! lol~

28-29Apr
we finally got to see & drive it! the usually lazy us... wen back to giv de car a good wash! hehe. hubby with his beloved wife (he calls it), hehe:



it was hubby's mum bday :) we headed to MS in de evening for Wild Hogs-nice! then at nite, we caught the 2nd half of Man U match @ Chan's place, hehe. supper was then at.. Checkers!

30Apr
hubby took leave, but i was working! lol~ busy like shit... i decided to snip snip my hair after work =p its thinner and shorter now!

1st May
brought our orange baby out for drive to town.. heh =p dinner was late, at Riverside Point- Indonesian Restaurant. yummy!

Happy 26th month hubby, thks for de lovely surprise- a winnie the pooh tumbler for work! :)

22nd Birthday :)

oops, been neglecting my blog for too long =p hehe.

officially 22 years old too! :) Birthday was spent with lunch @ Spring Court Restaurant wif my family, followed by Disney on Ice featuring Finding Nemo! hehe. There was 10% disc for DBS CC, so we booked the front seats :) nemo... was so cuteeee!! hehehe :p

we had a simple dinner (the after effects of having a heavy lunchie), then met hubby's frens thereafter for soccer :) YAY, MAN U won! lol~

Sunday.. lazy us lazed around in bed and only woke up ard 3+ -.-"" hubby decided to pop by Waffletown! been wanting to go there, but always too full to makan their waffle. Finally, we had the chance to try! hee.

chilling out wif kopi =p

the waffle is.. delicious!! :)

no exact plans in mind, so we wen driving ard Singapore in de evening. hehe. stop by all de clubs @ MS and took a snap wif it, den hanged ard de Singapore River =p

we headed home for home cooked food, then cake at nite :)

lovely heart-shaped tiramisu cake:

-one complete family- :)

It was a simple yet memorable birthday :) Thank u everybody, who send their wishes & gifts, thank you very much :):) I had a surprise to receive a S$50 Taka voucher from my colleagues too! Thanks so much, my family, my hubby & his family, my frens & colleagues! :)

Met my ex-colleagues last Thurs for dinner @ Fish & Co, then dessert @ Big O :) Thanks for the gift too gals! It was a gr8 nights out wif them, tho we had to work the very next day, hee :p

Last wkend, wen out wif hubby's family to settle his car issue :) We're gonna be car-less for quite some time, ah! Oh well... just gotta bear wif it, hehe :p

So this week, we travelled via public transport :) Its fun cos its sth different.. lest the trouble waiting for train & buses and having to squeeze in them =p watched Mr Bean yesterday and had a gd laugh! totally a good show to watch for 2 stress people =p

Today, instead of de usual shopping.. we wen for a swim! hehe. its been so long since i wen bk for a swim, so i tout it was a good idea wen hubby suggested it, hehe :)

took this while resting at the bench :p i love de dolphins.. a pity it wasnt spurting water (which it should be)..

i tink we shld do this more often, hubby says he feels fitter & healthier! hehehe..

got home in de evening.. and made this Butter cake for hubby :) been awhile since i cooked sth for him =p

a short week ahead, hope i dun get de Monday blues tmr! alright.. gonna wake the sleepy pig up now for dinner time, heh =p

:)

i practically din slp last nite..

my tummy hurt so much, i toss and turn, but stil couldnt get to bed.. :( i finally "surrender" at 4am. made breakfast for hubby :) gonna see him in an hour's time! *smile*

maybe i miss him so much tat i couldnt get to slp? hehe.. other than my painful tummy =p

hav a gr8 wkend peeps! :):):)

Some thoughts

I was reading FP forum.. and came across this post..

gal and guy have been tgt for 4 yrs. guy demands gal to wear "more branded" clothes as image to him is impt. t-shirt n jeans is a no-no for him.. de gal has to wear spag at least. they had small quarrel, which eventually leaded to their first break up. guy broke into gal's house to take back everythg he bought for her. 1 month later, de guy came kneeling down at her hse to ask for forgiveness. guy confessed to gal tat he had sex wif some gal ("X") tat he knew fr a pub. gal forgave guy after de guy promised tat he will change his temper & abusive behaviour.

afterwhich, de guy confessed another time to gal tat he had sex wif his ex colleague.

WHY? --> "cos he wanted to make sure who he loves, who he wans to be wif".

quoted from the gal -->

" sex to him is like an escape, knowing tat it will hurt me the most. i couldnt tink straight but i forgave him not knowing wad to do & how to react, and he proposed. He told me not to be so naive and tat all guys hav sex outside the r/s and tat he is being faithful by telling me de truth while most guys will not tell their gfs".

guy tells gal tat she has to accept his proposal as his relatives are aware of this "proposal" already, if not gal will be makin him lose face. guy threatened gal to take away the "pet" they had wif ever since dey got togeda.

quoted from the gal -->

"i am reali attached to de pet and hav been taking care of him. He said tat de pet signifies us and since we have broken up, he wants it back. Wen i refused to return to him, he barged into my hse, grabbed de animal and tie him in a plastic bag and put it in his bike's box. He said tat if i want my pet back, i hav to patch up wif him. I agreed knowing tat my pet will die suffocating in the plastic bag. Reporting to de police is uesless bcos he is not afraid".

"i still feel insecure & uncertain bout everythg esp my own future, but i hav tis sad tout in my mind. He told me tat no other man will wan a gal like me cos i hav given my virginity to him & in de end i wld realise he is de only one who wants me. It makes me feel dirty & disgusted wif myself & i suddenly hav 2nd thoughts bout myself".

Its scary hearing such stories.. pple change.. and whether its the truth/ lie.. its reali hard to tell sometimes..

The guy seems emotionally & mentally unstable. To have "sex" as an escape or is it an excuse for forgiveness?? If marriage comes into place, will such incidents not happen again? Its tormenting to follow orders from such a guy.. and even worse, an abusive one. Violent in a r/s? Totally let-down! For someone hu can take his pet as a threatening object.. wads worse if they hav kids in future? The innocent child will be de threatening object?? *ponders* SIGH!

Happy 2nd anniversary!

its finally gonna be Friday tmr! =p

28/2 -2300-

*phone ring, wake up from my slp*

hubby: baby! happy 2yrs anniversary! i nvr forget ok!

me: huh... haven yet leh.. still got 1 more hour.. hehe

hubby: huh, i purposely call at 830 india time so tat it is 2300 in sg leh..

me: ya lor.. u already say 2300 mah.. 2300 is 11pm only leh..

hubby: oh shit... dun luff at me lah... i lose face liao :/ okok, i put down now, 12midnite den i cor u again..

___________________________________________________________

01/3 -0000-

hubby: 12midnite le! happy 2yrs wor.

me: hehe.. happy anniversary..

hubby: its been a long journey and thanks for sticking tgt with me..

me: hee..

hubby: baby, 2 dogs came sniffing on my leg.. now they are kissing each other!

me: reali? hehe.. they muz be kissing on behalf of us.. muahaha~

hubby: hehe.. they shall be our metaphor :) call u tmr baby, phone gotta get cut off aldy. gdnite baby dearest.. ************** (censored)

___________________________________________________________

how time flies~ 2yrs jus past lidat..def treasured memories :):)

lookin back at the good old times..

during our 1st month of pathor.. wen hubby was still so botak! those were de "supper period", hubby and i put on weight lor! *faint* hehe.. tat isnt a couple top wor.. we jus happen to wear sth tat reali look similar to each other :) see de "bobo chacha" at de top left corner? gosh, tat "bobo chacha" made everyone tease and luff.. *hide face* so we changed to "mocha latte"... =p

the 2nd month :) im heavy.. but hubby insisted on carrying.. *blush* heh.

sweet lovely memories :) thanks for calling, hubby. i appreciate de thought :):)

-MOCHA & LATTE-

Surprise!

=p it was a busy day at work, seeing this email from hubby simply made me smile :) LOVE YOU, MY PRECIOUS!

yeap, counting down to 10th March now :) gonna cook something for hubby.. no curry for him definitely! hehe :p

Happy CNY!

Happy Chinese New Year! how was everyone's cny?? =p i am so in the cny mood tat i dun feel like going back to work at all! lol~

The eve of CNY was spent picking up hubby from the airport :) den had reunion dinner at my uncle's plc, afterwhich headed to River Hongbao wif hubby. it wasnt' as crowded as we expected. we took a stroll, catching up wif lost time =p hubby sure had a fun time in india! heh..

1st day of CNY, woke up super early to start the visiting. had lunchie at my mum's bro place to have his zhao pai "prawn noodle"! its a tradition every year, hehe :p

dad took this while waiting for sis :) nice new look of our brand new house! =)

hubby picked me up ard 4 to visit his grandma :) more to gamble i guess? wahaha~ gambled till 1am... wanted to play mahjong, but hubby was tired liao. heh. it was fun nevertheless! really thankful tat hubby's relatives are so nice pple to be wif :)

i love them all! :):) we wen crazy taking photos, heh.

2nd day of CNY, waited for dear bro to be home before we headed out. poor bro, had to do duty on de 1st day! :(

we squeeze all de visiting so we were done by noon time :) tired! relatives came to our place for dinner & gambling, hehe. SHIOK!

3rd day of CNY, hubby and i wen out for movie - Just Follow Law! heh, very funny! lol~ couldnt do much shopping as we had plans thereafter. hubby sent me to his uncle's condo @ Simei for his granduncle's birthday celebration while he goes to his fren's place.

i was "dragged" to the gambling section de moment i step in, LOL! once there, i cant stop gambling! wahaha~ won a little $$.. hehe..

this was at the function room, preparing for dinner & having yu sheng :)

aint she cute? i only see her once a year! hehe :p

hubby's dear cousins :) a pity claire & candice wasnt able to come for de dinner :/

-us during CNY 2007-

last wkend, we caught 2 more movies - Ghost Rider & The Protege. not too bad! :) had dinner togeda wif hubby's side @ Hongkong Street, den mahjong at nite :) Sunday - had early birthday high tea for mum @ Goodwood Park:) pics not wif me yet, hubby brought de camera to India, hehe =p

time to get back to work! sian~ no holidays for March at all! *faint* ooh, there's my birthday to look fwd to tho, hehe =p

bon voyage hubby! *smiles*